Perception
Sep. 9th, 2009 02:23 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
shosenHe sees himself in this forlorn place.
I could sense it, in his resistance when I asked him to leave. He is more, alert, in this place. As though he sleepwalks in all others.
He sees himself, as he is now, reflected back at him from scourge-tainted lands, constant fighting, and tenacious clinging to all that is left.
It frightens me, and I cannot say why.
I think, perhaps, it is because these lands, chaotic and sickly as they are, seem to be more complete than I have come to think of troll cities. Old, damaged, invaded, yes, but still somehow whole in what they are, rather than the shatter and crumbling ruins I have come to expect.
I never had the chance to visit Aviyanna and Zue’laji’s temple. I do not know what a real and whole troll city would look like. I do not want this place to become my template.
He has gone where I’ve asked, without question or complaint, since we found each other. This is the first time he’s asked anything of me, and I cannot deny him.
He sees himself, as he is now, in these lands. But when we are on them, when he looks around, alert and searching, I see him, as he was then.
Maybe that is what I’m afraid of.
I could sense it, in his resistance when I asked him to leave. He is more, alert, in this place. As though he sleepwalks in all others.
He sees himself, as he is now, reflected back at him from scourge-tainted lands, constant fighting, and tenacious clinging to all that is left.
It frightens me, and I cannot say why.
I think, perhaps, it is because these lands, chaotic and sickly as they are, seem to be more complete than I have come to think of troll cities. Old, damaged, invaded, yes, but still somehow whole in what they are, rather than the shatter and crumbling ruins I have come to expect.
I never had the chance to visit Aviyanna and Zue’laji’s temple. I do not know what a real and whole troll city would look like. I do not want this place to become my template.
He has gone where I’ve asked, without question or complaint, since we found each other. This is the first time he’s asked anything of me, and I cannot deny him.
He sees himself, as he is now, in these lands. But when we are on them, when he looks around, alert and searching, I see him, as he was then.
Maybe that is what I’m afraid of.